You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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