Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
