So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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