yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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