Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize
