Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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