? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
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