it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
