Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
COCAINE IS GR8
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
