If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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