oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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