Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I think I won the penis lottery.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
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