i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
