her vagine was all disorganized.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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