Im at strip club and am horny
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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