I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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