Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
