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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
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