I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize