I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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