I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I still have a little drunk in my system
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
