From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
