just tell him i said nine months
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He shit in the fireplace
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize