Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize