just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
It's never too late to be topless.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
