Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
