so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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