Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
