google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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