Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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