is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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