My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
