I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
