And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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