what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I will be naked everywhere
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Randomize