Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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