She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
The air was thick with penises
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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