I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
