Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
