He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Hippo gnu deer
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
