I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
