how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
