a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize