You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize