Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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