I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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