I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
My vagina is officially offended.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
