the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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