Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Terrible idea I love it
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Will exercising make me less horny?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
