I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
